Breathe

Don't forget to breathe

The world may pass by

Know this life is constant

Don't forget to breathe

Don't forget to breathe

Pray to one who's true

When seeking brings unbalance

Don't forget to breathe

Don't forget to breathe

Put feet to the ground

Leave the noise behind

Don't forget to breathe

Don't forget to breathe

Nothing stays the same

It will never change

Don't forget to breathe

Don't forget to breathe

Nothing behind or ahead

Eyes only on today

Don't forget to breathe

Adapted from Breathe by Alexi Murdoch

Jenny and Tyler

This is an awesome new video from one of my favorite music groups in Nashville! Check them out, they are the best. Go to their website to buy their albums.

http://jennyandtylermusic.com/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7G3tQKA2GSI

Searching For God Knows What

What does it mean to be a Christian? I've seen handouts that say it is a four step process.

1. recognize that you're a sinner

2. recognize that your sin makes you imperfect, unable to go to heaven

3. recognize that Christ died to cover your imperfection

4. accepting Jesus's sacrifice

I've heard the illustration that faith is like sitting in a chair. A person can have faith that a chair will hold them, but until they sit in the chair they haven't acted on their faith.

I don't feel like Christianity can be summed up by a process or a metaphor. There are hundreds of colleges and universities dedicated to the study of Christianity. My Bible has 1440 pages in it. I have considered myself to be a Christian for about 7 years. Understanding what Christianity is is a process that continues for me everyday. Christianity is a relationship. Its about a human falling in love with their creator. It is so much more than saying a prayer or getting dipped in water. When Jesus talks about salvation, he doesn't lay out a four step process, he tells people to love him and follow him. To sell their things and give to the poor, an act of selflessness. Jesus talks to Nicodemus about being reborn, leaving his old life to live to glorify God. A friend once asked me what it meant to be a Christian and it was such a hard question that I never really gave him an answer. Being a Christian means having a relationship so strong that you no longer can make decisions on your own, you have to consult God. It means giving up your life for the glory of God. God told Moses that he is "I Am" because God is so far outside of our understanding that "I Am" is the only way to come close to describing him in our language.

Finally a new post

struggling lately with finding what the next step for me is in this journey God has planned for me. Still i know to trust that Gods plan will be played out in his time. Highway life dosent have the billboard ive been looking for, but ive decided to stop looking. God's roadmap of my life isnt for me to look at, im going to focus on driving and leave the directions up to the one who knows the destination.

show me what this season in my life is for

i’ve been trying to seek You, seems You’re shutting every door

show me what this season in my life is for

cause i want so much more, so much more

-Jenny&Tyler "Season"

A Waste of Time

This blinking cursor deal is killing me! I read a magazine called Colide about media in the church and the different types of outreach taking place through media. I hope that one day i can be a part of something that will be written about in a magazine like this. I was reading about a church that has hired a "Internet Outreach pastor" very interesting. I believe the world is moving more and more towards using the internet as a medium of communication, news, and socializtion. I am very excited to hear about christians utilizing the internet as a medium to fellowship and to witness. Reading that article also made me want to write more on my own blog, and start reading others. However, in my experience of reading a couple of friends blogs which I have subscribed to, that the longer and more frequent the blog the less likely I am to read it, so while I'd like to write more I hesitate because I dont want to write excessively and bore people. This entry is a good example of a waste of your time.

Blue Like Jazz

I have been realizing lately how depraved the world is, how really in trouble it is. The book Blue Like Jazz changed my perspective on this. Donald Miller describes the world as a gaping bleeding wound that I as a Christian should be holding my hands up against trying to bring hope to a hopelessly broken place. I feel like Christianity is too often misrepresented by Christians. Instead of loving the people who live different lifestyles, and embracing people who lead immoral lives, Christians discriminate, and judge those people. If a gay couple walked into my church, I think my church would be ashamed of them, would avoid them, and ultimately they would leave. I know I would not be the one to welcome them into our sanctuary… but I should be. Jesus would sit down next to them and tell them he cared for them and he would want to know them and for them to know him; holding his hands against the wound of the world in their lives. One of the oldest and most intense actions in the world, Love, is seen as a revolutionary idea, when it is the thing we were supposed to be doing from the very start. Donald Miller describes the central message of Christianity as this:
“The message is that man sinned against God and God gave the world over to man, and that if somebody wanted to be rescued out of that, if somebody for instance finds it all very empty, that Christ will rescue them if they want; that if they ask for forgiveness for being a part of that rebellion then God will forgive them.”

This is what God has taught me in the past few weeks:
The world is full of sin so “Do not love the world nor the things in this world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world. The world is passing away and also it lusts; but the one who does the will of God lives forever.” (1John3:15)
But love the people who are afflicted by the world; “Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep yourself unstained by the world.” (James1:26)
Basically God wants me to Love more, and represent him better, and that he wants me to bring the message of Christ to the wounded.

Whats Next

I've been trying to figure out what I'm supposed to be doing with my life. The beginning of this school year had good hopes for me, but not being in school has proven to be harder than being there ever was. I'm afraid of getting older, Really I have everything I ever wanted right now, except time. I just want to stop here and enjoy everything and everyone that God has put in my life. I love my friends and being able to hang out with them, but if God points my life in a different direction will I still be able to hold on to those friendships? When I eventually move away I know I'll make new friends and have relationships that I cant compare to anything else, but I'm happy with the friends that I have. I'm scared of leaving them and/or not being able to hang out with them.
Another big issue that I've been struggling with is that I want to make a difference in the lives of people who don't have the freedoms and privileges I enjoy, and I know God has put that desire in me for a reason, and I try to be like him and treat everyone like he would want me too, but I want to make more of a difference than being a "good friend". Sometimes I feel like I should be doing something about RIGHT NOW but with so much else going on in life there's no way I could go off to another country to do something about it. God has also given me a passion for music, and I would rather sit and listen to music all day than do anything else. What I struggle with is how I can use my passion for music with my desire to help the needy, and on top of that moving away from my friendships to do it.

2007/ Clarity/ Lately -- Pain, Joy, Faith

i guess lots of people write "end of the year blogs" so I'll write one and try to squeeze a year of memories into a couple sentences.

2007- was one of the best years I can remember, and probably the most eventful. Spring break I did lighting for vacation bible school and spent some time with Emily (my cousin) which was really fun cause i don't get to see her much, then went to Nashville to visit Belmont and got to see one of my best friends,Elizabeth, while I was there. I found a new hobby. (along with Brad Brubaker) we started biking a lot, and even looked into biking to the keys over the summer. well summer came and me and brad were riding around a camp ground late at night and i didn't see the turn in the road and found myself slamming on my hand brakes but i have two brakes on my front tire and none on my bike so i went headfirst into a ditch and dislocated my shoulder. the doctor told me a dislocated shoulder hurts worse then a broken bone, and i wouldn't doubt it, although i've never broken a bone... So the bike trip was canceled and i was stuck in a sling for 2 months. I went to Vancouver with Jubilation with my sling. did some soul searching and tried to find focus on my walk with christ. I saw some stupid whales swimming around (OOO...) although i did have some good laughs with Brittney, Elyse Laura nad a couple other girls that went, so it wasn't all bad. the main reason i didn't want to go wahle watching really comes down to i wanted to go eat lunch at the market with Courtney ...2007 also brought the most meaningful relationship of my life so far, along with my first kiss with someone I'll never forget. I got to go to Georgia for a couple days after Christmas and spent some time with my cousins, and got introduced to some awesome music that I'm listening too right now.


Clarity- (student life) brought some things into perspective for me. I enjoyed David Platt more than any pastor I've ever listened to. His philosophy on life is exactly what I needed to hear. I loved his list illustration: make a two colom chart on one side list all of the things that you have, good or bad. your family your money idols school possessions, everything good or bad that you have. at the top write worthless. wasted. nothing. On the other side at the top write Priceless, everything and put God under it. because everything on this earth is wasted wether your a Christian or not it all goes to waste. God is everything, he is all that matters.
Not that everything else cant be good and/or right, just that it isn't what your living for.

Lately- since clarity I've been trying to break some of my bad habits and trying to bring into focus for myself how powerful and important God is. We serve a God who when he steps upon the earth at the end of Armageddon an entire mountain range will split in two and the entire earth will shake so violently that every mountain will fall and every valley will fill and every island will vanish. He is so terrifying and magnificent that if we were to look at him we would die. My favorite thing and what i look forward to most is God's voice. It is described as the sound of a piercing trumpet and of many rushing waters. I love music but all of the music in the world could never match up to it. So here is this powerful being that I serve and yet I turn from him constantly and focus on other things. giving humans or things the worship and attention that I should reserve for God.

Kayaking two days before Christmas. Only in Florida.

My arms are killing me. Me and Brad decided at 2:00 that we would go kayaking to the cape today. We figured it gets dark at six so if leave by about 3:30 we should be okay. I hurried to get some last minute Christmas shopping done then left T-Ville to head to the Cape where I would drop my truck off to pick up later. Brad met me and we headed to his house to set out on our ten mile paddle. His parents quizzed us on where we were going and how long it would take us cause they were worried about it being dark and us being out in the middle of the river. We left his house at about three thirty and made pretty good time getting from there to the 528 bridge over the Indian river. As we were going under we looked at the clock and decided we had been out for about 20 minutes. "If we keep this pace I think we'll make it in plenty of time." After the bridge the water got really calm and it was easy going, there was a slight northwest wind but since we had the land to the south of us the water wasn't choppy at all. I almost felt disappointed because i had wanted it to be a hard trip, 10 miles is as far as I've gone before in a Kayak, its no easy task. On our way through the barge canal we passed a sailboat going the same direction as us, I was feeling great, if we were passing boas we were definitely making good time. I turned around in my seat and could still see a little of the sun through the tree tops, that was good since the horizon must be well below those trees that are right in front of me. We went under the draw bridge and the sailboat had to stop and wait on the bridge to open. on our way past the marina we saw some really cool looking old shacks that we'll have to make another trip to explore later. About ten minutes later we were surprised by the sailboat passing us, I wondered if we had slowed down but there was really no way to tell. My fingers were getting really stiff on the paddle. it hurt to move them out of their curled position. I also had to reposition my hands because of a rising blister on my thumb. Brad was in the slower kayak and behind me a little bit so I looked to see if he was keeping up okay, we had agreed that we would switch kayaks at some point so that one of us wouldn't get worn out way before we got to our destination. I couldn't see the sun anymore but we were passing the second marina and I Could see the cruise ships in the distance, so I wasn't to worried. Brad wasn't ready to trade yet and that was fine with me since my arms had just begun to burn a little. He said that his arms were definitely going to be sore so I assumed that he must be working a lot harder with the slower kayak. We switched not long after that and noticed another interesting thing that we would have to come back later to explore, an old VW bus was sitting in the brush abandoned near the canal. We were finally into the Banana River now and I could see the sun again, reassuring me that we still had enough time to get to the other side of the locks and into the main channel at the cape. As we drew near the locks I was telling Brad about my past experiences going through it, the operator almost always had something to say to me about being safe or that I was doing something wrong. I think he just didn't like running a lock just to let some kayakers through. We waited outside the doors anxiously, they didn't open right away. We watched some manatees and dophins that were playing nearby. The other three times I had been through here I hadn't had to wait, it had been day time and there were lots of other boats coming and going through the lock, but now it was about 6:00 and the boat traffic was almost gone. Finally it opened after about 20 minutes of waiting. A boat came out and I started in, the operator leaned on the rail staring down at me, next to him stood a sheriff. He yelled at us because we had come in to soon and then told us we needed to wear our life jackets which we had strapped to the back of the kayaks since it was such a calm day. Okay whatever we put our life jackets on and waited on the doors to close. The sun was fading fast, and i was worried now because it was 6:20 and after the lock the next place to get out was where we had parked. at this point there was not turning back and calling someone to bail us out, we had to go the whole way. form the locks to Grills it was about 1 mile, alot more than me or Brad had expected. The rest we had given our arms while waiting on the locks was really hurting me now and I couldn't wait to be done and get out of this place. By the time we were passing the Sun Cruz Casino it was completely dark, if it hadn't been for the lights form the restaurants that line the water front we probably would have had a lot of trouble finding the place where I parked my truck.Finally we pulled up to the boat ramp beside Grills and pulled ourselves and our kayaks out of the water. As i stood my legs cramped and i bent over because my back was stiff. I stumbled away to get the truck and Brad took apart the paddles and got ready to load up. We made it, but learned some lessons that will probably help next time, 1. don't leave on a kayak trip right before sunset, 2. put your life jacket on before you get to the lock, and 3. (this is just for me) dont start out in the easy kayak.

BeggarTown

Beggartown is a non-profit organization started by some college students from my church.

Their main purpose is to be a ministry that shares the Gospel and raises money for missions at the same time. Patrick Maguire and Zach Dodd, both former "Firehouse Band" members, came up with the idea for the organization. Tonight they were at Firehouse selling t-shirts and CD's of their band (BeggarTown). Right now they are raising money to help build an orphanage in Uganda Africa. Both Patrick and Zach had to quit their jobs to basically become missionary's. The form that their ministry takes and the way they present it is very cool.
Check it out for yourself: http://beggartown.org/ http://www.zachdodd.com/

My Great Grandparents

My great grandmother (Mimi) and great grandfather (Papa) both got bad news about there health today, I'd like to ask everyone to pray for my family and extended family as we decide what to do about thier declining health situation.

Mimi has had several mini-strokes,She has severe dementia), she has severe back pain do to shingles and fractures in her spine, is recovering from breaking her leg (on two different occasions in the last 6 months), has alergy problems and probably has cancer, we're waiting on test results.
Papa has severe alergies, heart murmur,severe neuropathy in his legs (basically it feels like hes stepping down a step thats bigger than he thought every time he steps.)and he has also had some mini-strokes.

Thanks for reading and please pray for my family, Mimi's cancer (if that what it is,) will not be treated because treatment would kill her quicker than the cancer. Papa is also going through a hard time with everything and is seeking a part-time caregiver to help him take care of Mimi.

Wasup

Hey, if you have a blog on blogger leave a comment with your url so i can link to you. If your reading this on facebook click the "see original post" link to view my blog.
http://paulmurraysblogsite.blogspot.com/

The Wall

Nathan (my youth pastor) spoke on Samuel tonight. He told us the story of David and Goliath and made some great points about facing giants in our lives. Sometimes when I look at the direction my life is going it seems that all I can see is the giant, the elephant in the room, all I can see sometimes is how bad I messed up. but then as soon as I see it and I know it I turn back around and do the same thing again. It's like I'm running in the wrong direction and I hit this wall of realization that I'm going the wrong way, and it hurts a lot to get knocked down when I run full speed into the wall. So i get up and i say, man I'm so stupid, God why'd you let me do that? couldn't you have just gave me a different direction when i turned back there? But of course I look back and say Oh...you did... So then I go back and try to walk the right way. But then the very next day there I am again running into the same stupid wall again, and I'm a little more used to God's wrath this time, so I just kinda whimper and go back, and then hit the wall, then go back and hit it again and again and again. Nathan showed how the Israelites were standing there for 40 days looking at the giant, and he was all they could see because they had forgotten how big God was, I'm in that same place looking out across the battle field at my giant. But then David came out and he was like "what??? why are you scared?" and they said, "he's big! and your the littlest person here!" and David was just all relaxed and goes "yeah but I have bigger friends." and he walks out and the giant laughs and says, "your little, what the heck are you doing? I'm to big for you to even hurt" but david knew where he stood and saw how small the giant was in the big picture. I think that if I can convince myself that the giants I face are as small as Goliath was to David then I can get past my giants as easily as David did. So hopefully the next time I'm running and I see the path that leads to that wall I'll remember that God has the right path right in front of me and i don't have to run into the wall again to find it, and it'd hurt less not to hit the wall again too...

Now What??

Today I'm struggling with a very important decision. I'm not sure what God want me to do and I am so in need of direction that I don't even know where to turn to find it. Some of my close friends have already heard about it, but if you don't know just pray that God would make his will in my life obvious to me. It seems lately that just when I think everything is going to be okay, and I feel like my life couldn't be better, something bad happens. I'm not sure what God is trying to teach me through all of this, but i wish i was a quicker learner cause the learning process sure hurts alot...

You Give And You Take Away

If I look at the past week and a half it seems like I should be completely messed up, it’s been terrible. My car broke so now I have to buy a new one, my girlfriend broke up with me, the atm ate my credit card so I can’t cash my check, and since I don’t have a car I can’t go anywhere except work. But for some reason God has given me the strength I need to sort things out, it hasn’t been easy and I hope this next week will be better, but God works in mysterious ways and I don’t try to figure it out sometimes. A pastor I heard one time gave this illustration for people who are going through hard times:
There are spiritual highs and lows just like there are geographic highs and lows. Getting on a mountaintop is so refreshing, you feel a great accomplishment in it that you have climbed so high, you feel refreshed because of the crisp air; you stand amazed at the beauty of what is around you. But then you realize that while this feels so wonderful and life is so perfect, the only things growing are thin and weak, because the grass grows in the valley, the valley doesn’t feel good, it’s humid and there’s brush scraping you and hurting you. But look around, this is where things grow. In the same way a spiritual high can feel fantastic, but a spiritual low in your life can make you a stronger Christian. So like job in the Old Testament, I rejoice in my sufferings.

“You give and You take away. Blessed Be Your name!” -Job